Second Degree?

Thanks to the Sage for bringing this to my attention. On a bus outside of Toronto, a 40 year old man pulled out a knife and a pair of scissors and without warning began stabbing another rider. Following dozens of stabs, the man decapitated his victim, held it up for all to see, and then began hacking off pieces of the victim and eating them. Police arrived at the scene of the gruesome attack and arrested the assailant who has now been charged with second degree murder. Wait a minute! What the hell do you have to do to get a murder 1 charge in Canada? Do you have to eat the entire victim? If you leave left overs, does that drop it to a second degree?

And in what has become a tradition in grisly murders, someone was immediately on hand to say what a great guy the murder was and what a surprise it is. Usually it's a neighbor with the typical, "he was a quiet man, kept to himself, was always polite....." This time it was his boss who chimed in with:

Li's employer said in an interview Saturday that he was shocked to learn
that his "model employee" had been accused of the grisly attack. Vincent Augert,
an independent contractor who distributes newspapers in Edmonton, said that Li
was one of his most reliable carriers.

"He was very punctual and always cleanly dressed," he told The
Associated Press. "He was a very nice, polite guy. We would've had no reason to
let him go before all this happened."

Just once I'd like to hear someone just come out and say, "I knew something was wrong with that guy. I tried to warn the police." And FYI for everyone out there, I could also be described as punctual, cleanly dressed, very nice, and polite. I have no plans to ever eat "long pork" though.