Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Vegas Part I

As I mentioned previously, I spent last week in Vegas. It was my first trip there and I didn't entirely know what to expect. It's starting to get late so I'll save the rest for later, but for now let me just give some brief impressions. First of all, I was really in awe of the vast size of the hotels and casinos. They are the biggest damn buildings I've ever seen. So damn big in fact that for most of the trip my feet hurt like hell from wandering through them as well as up and down the strip. And I'm a little ashamed to admit that I got lost in Caesar's Palace .... twice. Only once in The Palazzo though. I'd started out in The Venetian and at some point made the transition over and couldn't find my way outside.

Unfortunately there was a national rodeo in town while I was down there and the city was overrun with inbred hicks wearing cowboy hats and boots and giant belt buckles. Country music was being played pretty much everywhere and when I would go into a casino or shop playing some crappy dance or pop music that I would normally despise, I was so relieved that it wasn't country that I actually welcomed it. Long story short, I'm lucky to have made it back here without having punched a hill billy and had I known that the rodeo was there, I would have rescheduled my trip.

I was really surprised by how much the casinos stunk. It was like being sucker punched right in the nose by a cigarette butt. People were smoking everywhere and it absolutely reeked.

I was also surprised that Vegas seems to be a haven for washed up has beens. When's the last time you heard anything from Bette Midler, Cher, Elton John, Donnie & Marie, Barry Manilow, etc. If it weren't for Vegas, these careers would have been over long ago.

I'm not a gambler, but I did do a little gambling there, but not too much. I plunked a dollar into a nickel slot machine at one of the casinos in old town Vegas - I think the Fitzgerald but don't remember for sure - it was just the first place I found that had slots that would let me put in actual change, pull the handle, and spit out coins when I won. Long story short, I was bored before I lost my dollar. I was planning on playing some quarter slots in the hopes of hitting a $10 jackpot or so and getting a months laundry money but didn't feel like playing any more slots at that point. The only other gambling I did was at the Monte Carlo. They gave me $20 in free play for staying there, but for some reason I had to spend a dollar of my own before I could start using the free play, I'm not sure why. Anyway, after about half an hour of video blackjack I cashed out and walked away with $19.75 in cash. So I ended up +$17.75 for the trip.

Well, that's enough for one day. Stay tuned for more boring stories not filled with excitement or debauchery. I did realize one of my life goals and got my picture taken with a showgirl. I declined the opportunity to get my picture taken with a couple Chippendales though.
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