Get Twitter Off My TV

I'm watching some of the Seafair events on tv this weekend and across the bottom of the screen is a constant scrolling twitter feed of what people are saying about Seafair.  This seems to be an increasing occurrence during sporting events and I can't help wondering just who the hell gives a damn what some random attention whore has to say.  Obviously I would prefer to have it off my screen and have the entire picture dedicated to what I'm watching, but as this proliferates I wonder if I'm in the minority here.  I hope it's a trend that dies out soon.  I get that television stations would like their viewers to be more interactive and think that engaging them will increase viewership or something, but this just seems like a huge waste of time to me.

Exercise Network

I turned on the TV the other day and was greeted by an info-mercial for the latest fad exercise product.  These seem to be particularly prevalent on weekend mornings, I don't know if that is because that's when most people are exercising, or because that's when ad time is most affordable.  Anyway, it got me thinking that the revenue model seems to be completely backward.  Rather than spend money advertising to get people to buy your way overpriced DVD, why not have an entire network dedicated to exercise.  Then P90X, Insanity, and all the other repeat offenders that I keep seeing could be paid by advertisers to air their program rather than the other way around.  This would allow them to make more money in the long term by having repeated airings rather than a one time DVD sale that you never see money from that customer again.  It also opens up your product to a larger market of customers like me who have no intention of ever purchasing a workout DVD but might watch if one were available through broadcast. Additional revenue streams could be opened up by selling streaming rights to Netflix and Amazon Instant Video, or selling them through iTunes.  I think that there is just a larger long term revenue opportunity than the current model.

The one sticky point for me right now, however, is the name.  The Exercise Network might not be catchy enough.  The logical move is for ESPN to start a new channel and name it EXPN, but who knows if they have any interest in that.  Perhaps the Fitness Network or Hot Bodies or something more provocative might be more effective.  But I'll leave that to the network executives to come up with their own name.  For now I just think that there is an untapped market that could disrupt the current business strategy and make a lot of money.

NFL Draft

It's been quite some time since I've written anything, for a variety of reasons, but the NFL draft is a holiday in the Craw Fu household and I can't let it pass without voicing my opinions.  So I've got a special treat for you today - a full first round mock draft.

1. Chiefs - Luke Joeckel, OT Texas A&M
If the rest of the draft experts in the world are correct, this is a foregone conclusion.  I have no reason to disagree.

2. Jaguars - Dion Jordan, DE Oregon
The Jags have a lot of holes to fill, so this pick is a crapshoot, but they could use a pass rusher.

3. Raiders - Eric Fisher, OT Central Michigan
The Raiders have traditionally been the easiest team to mock in mock drafts, and I'm tempted to say they will draft Marquise Goodwin here since he ran the fastest 40 at the combine, but I'll try to take it seriously.  Most experts are predicting the Raiders will take a DT here, and they sure do need a DT, but this year's draft is much deeper at D line than O line and I think they can get a solid DT later on.  Taking an OT that will keep their new QB upright and help out in the running game for the next decade seems like a better move to me.

4. Eagles - Star Lotuleilei, DT Utah
The Eagles need a lot of help on defense, and Star is a good fit.

5. Lions - Ziggy Ansah - DE BYU
The Lions have drafted defensive linemen high in the first round 2 of the last 3 years, so I have a hard time pulling the trigger on this one, but this is also the same team who drafted a WR in the first round every year for almost a decade, and I'm really high on Ziggy.  I think he's going to be amazing.

6. Browns - Dee Milliner, CB Alabama
The Browns biggest need is corner, and Dee is as good as it gets in this draft.

7. Cardinals - Chance Warmack, OG Alabama
The Cardinals offensive line has been downright offensive in recent years.  Warmack is a mauler who will help them in a big way.

8. Bills - Cordarrelle Patterson, WR Tennessee
Provides much needed help on offense.  Rumor has it that the Bills really like Syracuse QB Ryan Nassib, but trust me when I tell you he'll never amount to anything.  Rumor has it that the Jets also are high on Nassib, so maybe the Bills can sucker the Jets into trading up.

9. Jets - Xavier Rhodes, CB Florida State
What the Jets need most is a really fast WR who can chase down defensive backs after Mark Sanchez throws an interception.  And while they need a QB, they can't really afford one until they get Sanchez off the roster.  I think their biggest need now that they traded Darrelle Revis is CB, hence Xavier Rhodes.

10. Titans - Jonathan Cooper, OG North Carolina
The Titans will be thrilled to have him drop in their laps

11. Chargers - Lane Johnson, OT Oklahoma
Also thrilled to have him drop to them.

12. Dolphins - Desmond Trufant, CB Washington
The Dolphins need a tackle too, but rumor has it a trade is in the works for Branden Albert from the Chiefs, so the good Trufant comes off the board here.  Good luck Desmond.

13. Jets - Barkevious Mingo, DE LSU
The Jets are back on the clock and get some pass rush help with Barky.

14. Panthers - Sharrif Floyd, DT Florida
Considered by some to be the best DT in the draft, the Panthers will be thrilled with this pick.

15. Saints - Kenny Vaccaro, S Texas
The Saints pass defense was amazingly bad last year and needs help in a big way.

16. Rams - Tavon Austin, WR West Virginia
I love Tavon Austin.  Love.  It will be hard to see him in a Rams uniform.  And it will be hard to see him get killed by the Legion of Boom twice a year.

17. Steelers - Jarvis Jones, OLB Georgia
I don't know if the Steelers have ever drafted a linebacker in the first round, but Jones is too good for them to pass up here.

18. Cowboys - Sheldon Richardson, DT Missouri
Good fit for the boys.

19. Giants - Alec Ogletree, MLB Georgia
The Giants need linebackers.  A lot of them.

20. Bears - Tyler Eifert, TE Notre Dame
The Bears desperately need someone other than Brandon Marshall who can catch. Plus he can help block on running plays!

21. Bengals - Eric Reid, S LSU
Good fit for the Bengals.

22. Rams - Keenan Allen, WR California
The Rams really need someone for Bradford to throw to.

23. Vikings - Manti Te'o, MLB Notre Dame
I'm tired of writing commentary, so I'm going to stop unless I have something interesting to note.

24. Colts - D.J. Hayden, CB Houston

25. Vikings - Sylvester Williams, DT North Carolina
The Vikings are running low on DTs named Williams.

26. Packers - Eddie Lacy, RB Alabama

27. Texans - Justin Hunter, WR Tennessee

28. Broncos - Bjoern Werner, DE Florida State

29. Patriots - Johnthan Banks, CB Mississippi State

30. Falcons - Damontre Moore, DE Texas A&M

31. 49ers - Cornellius "Tank" Carradine, DE Florida State
Great value here if Tank recovers from a torn ACL.  I was hoping he'd drop to the Seahawks in the 2nd round, but that doesn't look like that will happen.

32. Ravens - Matt Elam, S Florida
The Ravens also need a MLB to replace Ray Lewis, but they need a replacement for Ed Reed worse.


So there you have it.  That's exactly how it will play out.  Except that the Cardinals might go with Geno Smith instead.  It's hard to imagine he won't go in the first, but looking at the team needs it doesn't look like it will play out that way.

As for the rest of the draft, someone is going to get a bargain with Robert Woods.  I think he's the best WR in the draft, and it's a possibility that the Seahawks might snag him if he's on the board with their 2nd round pick, but I think Brandon Williams (DT) from Mississippi Southern State is a better fit.  That guy is a road block and will really shore up the run D. 

In the 3rd round, I really like Zaviar Gooden (OLB) from Missouri.  He's extremely athletic and a great fit for the Seahawks.  I also like Marquise Goodwin later in the draft.  He's got a lot of work to be an NFL receiver, but he's explosive and has potential.

Free Will?

Lately I've spent some time considering the nature of existence. Current scientific knowledge states that the universe is controlled by the laws of physics and mathematics. That the interactions of everything from sub atomic particles all the way up to the biggest galaxies are governed by these laws and everything in their past can be charted, and the future actions can be predicted. The next logical question for me at this point is: does this also apply to human existence?  Would humanity not also be subject to math and physics?  Is free will an illusion? Are we simply automatons that have been wound up and set loose on our appointed path, predetermined for us by mathematical probability?  I'm sure I'm not the first person to consider this and I won't be the last.  I haven't done any research on the topic, partly because I want to think about it myself before potentially being influenced by the opinions of others, but mostly because I'm lazy.  But maybe I'm lazy because that's what the universe has predestined for me.  Regardless, it's interesting to consider.

The Hobbit

A few weeks ago I watched The Hobbit, and have intentionally let some time pass before writing up a review to let it sink in. I loved the book, I loved the Lord of the Rings books and movies, and so I had pretty high expectations going in. Experience has taught me that the higher the expectations, the higher the probability to be disappointed - so that was a major hurdle for Peter Jackson.  Did he clear that hurdle?  Not entirely.  I enjoyed the film, and think it is worth watching, but it could have been so much better.

I'll start out with the obvious - The Hobbit is way too long and the plot moves along at a glacial pace. Literally. I think there are glaciers now being formed in Alaska which will migrate and break off into the sea before the last frame of The Hobbit is viewed.  For those that don't already know, this is a relatively short book that is being turned into 3 movies 3 hours long, and I have a friendly 5 cent wager with a friend who thinks that Peter Jackson will split the third installment into 2 films in order to milk every last penny out of the franchise. Anyway, in order to pad the script, Jackson culled The Silmarilian, some of author J.R.R. Tolkein's notes, some of the material from the Lord of the Rings that was cut from those films, and I suspect Jackson just made some of it up as well.   The result is a plodding, bloated mess, and I frequently found myself thinking, "for God's sake, get on with it." Really, how long can you watch dwarves being chased through a cave by goblins before it stops being interesting? I don't know how long that particular scene lasted, but I swear it seemed like half an hour. Peter Jackson's films are starting to make Ken Burns' documentaries look effectively edited by comparison.

There's a good reason that Tolkein left a lot of that material in his notes and didn't include it in the novel, a lot of it just didn't fit. For example, a scene with Gandalf, Elrond, Sauron, and Galadrial, which was just mentioned in passing in the novel but is fleshed out in the film, just seemed out of place. And the scenes with Radagast the brown would have been better left out all together.  I was listening to a financial show that went off the rails recently and began discussing The Hobbit when one of the financial analysts remarked that Radagast the brown is the Jar Jar Binks of the Hobbit franchise. I couldn't have said it better myself (so I didn't). Along with the ridiculous Goblin King character, Jackson is starting to take cues from George Lucas and is adding unwanted comic relief. And everybody knows, you never go full Lucas.

These things aside, it is a good story. At it's core, it's the story of a group of dwarves setting out on a journey to recover their gold and kingdom that were taken from them by a dragon.  The story has adventure, camaraderie, dragons, goblins, trolls, wizards, etc. what more could you ask for? In particular, the interplay between Bilbo Baggins and Gollum was riveting and saved the third act. I'm not sure how much of my enjoyment is colored by my love of middle earth. Still, there were some nice touches, for example I quite enjoyed the dwarves singing That's What Bilbo Baggins Hates as a nod to the old Rankin & Bass cartoon I loved so much as a child. 

The cinematography was amazing.  I didn't see the movie in a theater with a 48 frame per second projector, just the traditional 24 fps, so technically I only saw half of the movie.  A lot of people have complained about the high frame rate, but I can't comment on that.  All I can say is that it is visually stunning in the format I watched.  The beautiful scenery and amazing sets completely blew me away.  They could have filmed a feature length travelogue of Rivendell with Rick Steves telling me where to eat and which sites to visit while there and I would have watched it. 

The unnecessary additions to the story seem to be an attempt to add gravitas, but the source material was perfectly adequate as it was.  The scope of Peter Jackson's vision seems to be too grand, and The Hobbit part 1 ended up being a little disappointing.  But a failure to live up to expectations does not mean it's a bad movie.  I'll close by including a video of Leonard Nimoy singing the Ballad of Bilbo Baggins.  It has nothing to do with the movie, but I think it's so funny that I'll seize any opportunity to mention it. 

Washington Huskies

Recently the PAC-12 network replayed all of the Husky victories this year, edited down to an hour.  I've been watching them the last few days and considering next season. I've concluded that a lot of changes are in order if the team hopes to improve.

For starters, I'm beginning to question the coaching staff.  Two of the biggest symptoms of poor coaching are penalties and turnovers.  The Huskies finished 2012 ranked 118 out of 120 in penalties committed, seemingly every game having at least one penalty that cost the team a score one way or the other, or extended a drive.  Similarly abysmal is the team ending the season 101st in turnovers lost.  And I can say for certain that turnovers cost wins. While the defense was much improved in 2012, there were still a significant amount of missed tackles.  All in all, the fundamentals were dismal. And the team frequently tried to get cute by running up to the line and quick snapping the ball to try catch the defense unprepared, but more often than not it caught the Huskies unprepared and ended in disaster. Every time I saw the offense sprint out of the huddle, my immediate reaction was, "oh no....". In regards to Steve Sarkisian in particular, in 4 years as head coach, he's managed records of 5-7, 7-6, 7-6, and one more 7-6. To go along with this, his bowl record has been 1-2. The team is no longer showing any signs of improvement, and I think it's fair to question whether Sark has taken them as far as he can. 

The biggest concern on both sides of the ball was the line.  The offensive line was plagued by injury throughout the season, however that doesn't excuse them from finishing 104th in sacks allowed, but at least they were better than the Washington State line who finished dead lase, and it wasn't even close. Keith Price spent most of the season running for his life.  The defensive line took a big hit in week 1 losing Hau'oli Jamora for the season, but even had he been healthy I'm not sure he much difference he would have made. The line was terribly undersized and pushed all over the field by bigger offensive lines all season, the worst coming in the LSU game where they were absolutely mauled.  I don't know why the team is no longer able to recruit big men, but that has to be the biggest focus for the coaching staff.  In the glory days of the UW, the team brought in a lot of talent from the Pacific islands, however in recent years, recruiting there has fallen to virtually nothing.  After a quick once over on the roster, it looks like the UW has 6 players from Hawaii, which is actually more than I thought there were, but still not enough.  The UW really needs to step up the recruiting in Hawaii, Samoa, and Guam if they want to succeed, they can't let the other west coast schools steal those players.

On offense, Bishop Sankey performed better than I think anyone expected and was the engine that kept the offense running.  I still have trouble wrapping my mind around him being named player of the game in the Las Vegas Bowl despite losing the game.  It's scary to think what he could accomplish behind a quality offensive line and a balanced offensive attack.  He's the guy the offense should build around in 2013. WR should be high on the recruiting to do list though.  Awesome Seferian-Jenkins and Kasen Williams were reliable targets, but no one else could be counted on to catch a pass.  As a matter of fact, I can't recall if Jaydon Mickens caught a pass all season or if he dropped every single one thrown his way.  That kid needs to be moved to the defensive side of the ball ASAP to limit how much he can hurt the team.

I don't know what happened to Keith Price in 2012, his performance can best be described as terrible.  Sure, he was running for his life a lot of the time, but he still locked onto receivers, held onto the ball too long, ran around in the pocket and took sacks instead of taking the 5 yard dump off pass, and repeatedly made inaccurate and ill advised throws.  As a matter of fact, his accuracy and arm strength were bad enough that I can't help wondering if he had an arm injury.  He couldn't get any zip on the ball, and passes over about 20 yards were an adventure - the ball would float enough to give the defense plenty of time to react, and often missed the target significantly. At this point, I don't know if he can be salvaged and return to his 2011 level of play, or if it's time to look for a replacement. 

A year ago, I couldn't imagine saying this, but right now the defense looks like much less of a project. I already mentioned that the line needs an overhaul, but the young linebacking corp actually looked very good by the end of the season.  That's a group that should really be good for the next couple years.  And the defensive backs were serviceable, which is something I haven't been able to say in about a decade.  Desmond Trufant will be difficult to replace, and Parker and the Shamburgler were prone to getting burned on occasion, but this isn't a unit that will cause me to lose sleep.  All of the DBs showed improvement throughout the season and should continue to improve next year. 

Things may change after the offseason recruiting is done, but at this point there are so many holes to fill that it's hard to imagine that the Huskies will have anything to look forward to in 2013 other than another 7-5 year punctuated by another bowl loss.  The coaching issues are significant enough that I think it's time to question whether Sarkisian is part of the problem or part of the solution.  I honestly don't know at this point. Maybe a new strength and conditioning coach is in order too, since there were so many injuries. There are enough pieces in place that the team could potentially win 9 or 10 games in 2013, but the coaching staff has a lot of work to get there.

Johnny Manziel

I hate the nickname 'Johnny football'. I hate it so much.  I have nothing against Johnny Manziel or his ability, I just hate the nickname. It is so completely devoid of any creativity or panache that it sounds like something a junior high kid would have come up with.  Like calling Bill Gates 'Billy computers' or maybe calling John Glenn 'Johnny space'. It's just uninventive and stupid.  Hell, even the mob comes up with better nicknames for people like 'Micky glasses' or 'Tommy the hat' (assuming Tommy regularly wears a hat). I'm sure Chris Berman rolls over in his grave every time he hears it.  And I know what you're thinking: Chris Berman isn't dead. Well, since he hasn't used his authority to put an end to this, he's dead to me. 

But I digress.  My point is that announcers should be ashamed of themselves for saying it. Sure, many of them did not get where they are based upon their intellect or eloquence- a fact I'm reminded of every time I hear the term 'trickeration' (which I think I may hate even more) or anything that comes out of the mouth of Shannon Sharpe (who sounds eerily reminiscent of Mushmouth from the Cosby Kids). Regardless, they are technically journalists and should have some baseline standard that they should strive to remain above. Not to mention that most of the former players have college degrees and really should be capable of conversing above an 8th grade level.  On the other hand, I've listened to sports radio and am aware of the fact that many callers are vitriolic mouth breathers and/or high functioning people with mental and social disorders, so it's entirely possible that broadcasters intentionally dumb down their broadcasts to appeal to the lowest common denominator.  I think that's a little optimistic though.

Why I bring this up now is that I'm currently watching the Cotton Bowl and the announcing crew is churning it out rapid fire, like they are getting a commission for every mention of 'Johnny football' (brought to you by Carl's Jr!) and it is truly driving me crazy. Throw in the fact that Petros Papadakis, one of my most hated announcers, is also on the broadcast crew and it is nearly the perfect storm.  I don't think I'm going to be able to finish watching the game. And I'm not sure I'll ever be able to watch another Johnny Manziel game in my lifetime, and God forbid he ever faces off against Tim Tebow, I think my head might just explode.  And since this game is getting out of hand, and that Boardwalk Empire blu ray that Netflix was kind enough to send me is looking pretty enticing over there on the shelf, I think I'm done for the night here. Best of luck to Johnny 'the Man among boys' Manziel. I'm not one to criticize without offering an alternative.  Actually, sometimes I am, just not tonight.

Election Reform

With the election finally upon us, it's time to stop procrastinating and type up my thoughts on campaign reform. It seems to me that every successive election gets more contentious. I can't watch TV without seeing repeated commercials stating '[insert candidate] is just too extreme', 'we can't afford to elect [insert candidate]', or 'civilization as we know it will come to an end if [insert candidate] gets elected', or '[insert candidate] wants to steal all your money, kill your family, and dance on their graves (cue ominous music)'. It is truly becoming nauseating. Not to mention that, as I understand it, there are no slander or libel laws in campaigning. You can say pretty much anything you want about a candidate with no fear of repercussion.

Elections have become so negative that people don't want to vote for anyone, resulting in record low voter turn out in each successive election.  That's why my solution is to amend the electoral process to allow voters to vote against a candidate rather than for one.  If you don't like any of the candidates, you would have the option of taking a vote away from a candidate you don't like.  If campaigning is negative, why shouldn't voting be negative as well.  Of course, if a race gets too unsavory, it would open up the possibility of someone flying under the radar - like Libertarian presidential candidate Gary Johnson - winning the election because the other candidates all have negative votes.  The law of unintended consequences might just be what it takes to finally elect Lyndon Larouche or Ron Paul.  This would effectively force candidates to clean up their campaigns or things might get interesting.

In related news, campaign spending has gotten out of control.  According to recent data, team Obama is spending roughly $5.33 per registered voter while team Romney is spending $4.81.   

President Barack Obama and former Mass. Gov. Mitt Romney are spending a combined $26.86 every second this election cycle, as a binge of campaign spending deluges voters with rallies, banners, and of course, TV ads.

The figure comes from a grand total of nearly $1.5 billion spent by both sides just through September. And that works out to about $70 million per month, and more than $2.3 million every day, according to data provided by the Federal Election Commission.

That is an astonishing sum of money that I can't help feeling would be a lot better spent on something more productive.  When I'm seeing so many political ads that I'm missing the usual ads for erectile dysfunction, the Snuggie, and GEICO, then something has to be done.  Perhaps if 20 cents of every dollar spent had to go toward paying down the national debt until it is wiped out, that would be a start.  Add to that a hefty fine for any candidate or PAC that makes slanderous ads and we are really making some progress. 

Vote Craw Fu for innovative solutions!

In closing, I'll leave you with this:  “Mitt Romney, I hear he wears magic underpants. I expect the leader of the free world to go commando.” - Homer Simpson

Marcus Lattimore

In case you aren't a football fan or simply missed it, South Carolina running back Marcus Lattimore suffered a horrific knee injury today.  Considered by many to be a potential first round pick in the upcoming NFL draft, his ability to play again is now in question.  Having suffered a serious knee injury myself, I have some idea of how devastating it is and my heart really goes out to him.  The team and medical staff have not yet released any information regarding the severity of the injury, but I can say that it was as bad as any I've ever seen and I have no doubt he has multiple torn ligaments.  If you are at all squeamish, do not watch the video in the above link. 

By all accounts, Marcus was an exceptional young man, universally liked.  Teammates, announcers, and even opponents have never had anything but good things to say about him, and it really breaks my heart to see bad things happen to good people.  I pray that he is able to make a recovery and resume his football career, but I know he has a long difficult road ahead of him. My knee surgery was by far the most painful thing I have ever experienced, and the following physical therapy was the most difficult ordeal I have ever gone through, so God speed Mr. Lattimore. My heart is with you every step of the way.  You have the advantages of youth and superior genetics on your side, not to mention a nation of well wishers.  Keep your head up.

Mockingbird Lane

Tonight I watched the pilot of Mockingbird Lane, a remake of the 1960's series The Munsters. This is quite a departure from the original, and while this is just one episode and it's too early to make a firm judgment, for the most part it was pretty terrible.

For starters, this iteration isn't a comedy, or if it is I didn't notice any humor.  Which is a shame, because Portia de Rossi is a brilliant comedic actress. She was wasted on a very limited role.  If more episodes are made, they would do well to feature her more. Anyway, this is a much darker show, with the pilot primarily revolving around Grandpa's desire to kill and eat people, and young Eddie Munster coming to the realization that he's a werewolf and has killed several people.  I guess the lone attempt at humor was making Eddie a vegetarian, which is one of my pet peeves - kids that don't act like kids.  Kids that age don't have a social conscience or choose to be vegetarian, if they do it is because they are told to be that way by an adult and clearly his family is quite the opposite.  But I'll drop that before I go off on a full fledged rant.

The original was mostly based around the reaction of strangers to realizing that there are monsters in their midst. In contrast, with the exception of some scars on Herman most of which are covered by clothes, these Munsters just look like a family of hipsters.  Other than some flamboyant clothing, they are visually indistinguishable from normal folks.  And rather than trying to fit into society, they are not tied to any community and have no interest in socializing except when it is to their benefit. They calmly discuss killing people and come across more as sociopaths that the lovable monsters they were in the original. 

Jerry O'Connell is miscast as Herman Munster.  His performance was very flat and unemotional.  Perhaps that was intentional, the idea being that as a Frankenstein like monster, he has difficulty feeling emotion.  It didn't work, though, he just came across as bored.  Eddie Izzard did well with what he had to work with, and seemed very devious. In my opinion, though, Cheyenne Jackson stole the show with a small part.  He was the only actor who seemed to bring any life to the role, no pun intended.  It's a shame he won't be back if the series is picked up. 

On the bright side, the production was extraordinary for a television series.  The sets, costumes, and special effects were worthy of a feature film.  I loved the design of the house, it had just the right combination of opulence and creepiness.  The special effects created a wonderful ambiance, for example, my favorite shot was near the beginning of the episode - a boy scout troupe is running through the woods superimposed in front of an enormous full moon.  It was beautiful, but I can't find a screen shot, so here is the mansion instead. 

I know the intent was to create something new, and not simply rehash the original, I just felt it didn't work.  It was as lifeless as Herman Munster's corpse before being reanimated by a jolt of electricity.  The writing, acting, and direction was simply uninspired and honestly, the whole show was disappointing.  From what I've read, the series has not been picked up and only the pilot was ordered so this may be the end of it.  I had high hopes for the series and if it does get picked up, I think there is a lot of re-tooling that needs to be done to salvage it.  There is a lot of talent involved, though, so there is reason to believe that they can make it work.  As is, though, it is pretty lackluster.

Stubbed Toe

Tonight I absolutely stubbed the hell out of my toe.  Actually my 3 middle toes on my right foot.  Somehow the big toe and pinkie toe were spared, but the other 3 got crushed to the point that it took all the restraint I could muster to keep from shouting profanities loud enough that the neighbors would call the police.  I'm of the opinion that a solid toe stubbing is one of the most unpleasant experiences in life.  Off the top of my head, the only thing I can think of that is more upsetting is waking up from a dead sleep with a calf cramp.  And come to think of it, I'll probably wake up with a cramp tonight just to make this day perfect.

Full Moon

For years now, I've been trying in vain to take a decent picture of the moon. And so tonight when I saw a full moon peeking through the trees, I thought I'd give it another try.  The problem is that I can never get it to look like anything other than a glowing blob in the sky.  No matter what settings I try, I am unable to get any detail.  I would love to be able to see the Sea of Tranquility, but to no avail.  Granted, I don't have an expensive DSLR camera, but I feel like my point and shoot should be able to do better than this.  I had it on a tripod and set it for night landscape mode.  Is there some other mode that would work better? The only night modes I have are night landscape and night portrait.  Do I need to study up and figure out what manual settings work?  I will say that this does take way better pictures than my cell phone at least.

National Coffee Day

Happy National Coffee Day, one and all.  This is a day that traditionally is filled with peace and love because people can't be unhappy with a cup of coffee in their hands.  At least not a good cup of coffee, Seattle's Best makes me angry sometimes.  But I believe that we could have world peace if only everyone who had a disagreement would sit down with their adversary and enjoy a delicious cup of hot coffee. 

That said, I decided to celebrate this momentous occasion by roasting some fresh coffee.  I started out with some green Costa Rica tarrazu beans.

Roasted them for about 8 minutes in my Fresh Roast +

Cooled the beautiful, delicious, dark roasted beans.

 

 

I then ground and brewed them, added some half & half, and am now enjoying a delicious cup of coffee.  Another successful National Coffee Day in the Craw Fu household! 

 

 

And lest you think that is all, let me just say that a new study has found that a green coffee bean supplement will help you lose weight.  In a 22 week study, men and women lost an average of 17 pounds when taking the supplement.  There is seemingly no end to the health benefits of coffee!  Truly a super food.  

Apple and the iPhone 5

Recently, The Molitor, a self proclaimed Apple zealot, posted a brief treatise on what makes the iPhone, and Apple products in general, great, and I feel the need to rebut.  If you don't want to take the time to read his position, it can essentially be summarized as 'they make pretty products'. Never mind the fact that Apple just sued Samsung, claiming that the Galaxy SII was designed so that it was indistinguishable from the iPhone to the layman.

To provide full disclosure, let me just say that Apple makes fine products, I personally have owned 2 ipods for several years, and for a while owned some Apple stock and sold it for a tidy profit.  Had I held onto it longer, I would like the company a whole lot more. Apple is a well run company and does a lot of things well.  Their forte is in user interface.  For years they have designed their products in a way that they are easier to use than a majority of their competitors, and I will readily admit that my android phone has room to improve in this area - some things are more difficult to do than they should be.  Apple is also second to none in marketing.  There is a well known proverb 'a fool and his money are soon parted', and nobody does a better job of separating fools from their cash than Apple. Time and again, Apple has taken existing products and ideas, repackaged them and slapped an Apple logo on them, and convinced a large portion of the populace that it was their idea.  Even a former Apple executive admitted as much, saying that, "Apple haven't invented anything."

That brings me to what I don't like about Apple, beginning with the legion of cult members. For example, when Apple released the white iPhone 4, the fanboys fell all over themselves lining up to get in line to throw their money at Apple, proclaiming the company execs to be geniuses for inventing the color white.  Example #2: Jimmy Kimmel recently took to the street to gauge public response to the iPhone 5.  He showed people the iPhone 4S, told them it was the iPhone 5, and they predictably fawned over how much faster it was, how it was lighter weight, how much better the display was, etc.

In general, Apple customers are the epitome of conspicuous consumption, however rather than buying Apple products to display wealth (as is the dictionary description), they buy them to convey status.  They feel that owning the latest Apple product somehow makes them cool, little knowing that it makes them a laughingstock.

I'm not one to let the opinion of others to influence my decision, so I'll continue.  I dislike Apple's restrictive environment.  Users are restricted in what they can do with the products they own, and developers are handcuffed with what they are allowed do do with apps.  This is exactly the thing that opened the door for Microsoft to dominate them in the PC market, and has opened the door for Google to walk through in the phone and tablet market.  Unless Apple learns from past mistakes, they will continue to see their market share erode.  But I digress, my point is that not only do several existing Android and Windows Mobile phones sport superior specs, but they allow you the freedom to do more with your device. I realize that this is a point of preference, as many people would sacrifice performance for usability, but I am very much a utilitarian, and being able to do more and do it faster is more important to me.

This leads me to my next issue: an inability to keep pace in performance has led Apple to become incredibly litigious.  Their answer to eroding market share, rather than create better products, has been to sue everyone in sight.  They recently won a decision against Samsung, which most experts agree will probably be overturned or significantly reduced upon appeals, but more importantly will undoubtedly set off a chain reaction of retaliatory and pre-emptive lawsuits, all to the detriment of the consumer.  Yes, I absolutely believe that Apple should have the right to defend it's patents, and to some degree I believe that this is more an issue with the horribly broken patent system which will issue a ridiculous patent for a rectangular shape with curved corners. Mark Cuban has written extensively and more eloquently than I could regarding patent law, so I won't waste time duplicating efforts. My point is that this spate of lawsuits will reduce competition in the industry and increase the cost of products.  The big loser will be consumers.  There is a well written editorial here, and I couldn't state it any better than this:

In the end, consumers will lose. Companies high and low are scrapping potentially amazing product ideas right now for fear of legal retaliation. Not just from Apple -- this ruling is way, way bigger than that -- but from any company with a patent on [insert obscure shape here]. I hope we're happy.

The lawsuit against Samsung was primarily fueled by Steve Jobs' insane ego, so I hope that with Tim Cook now in charge, perhaps cooler heads will prevail, however I fear that Pandora's box is now open and can't be closed again.

Again, full disclosure: I currently own a Motorola Droid Bionic.  I'm happy with it, but would have preferred the Samsung Galaxy SII if only it were available from Verizon.  Prevously I owned a Samsung Omnia (Windows Mobile), and prior to that a Motorola Razr.  I believe that Samsung currently makes the highest quality phones, and will look had at their products when it comes time for me to upgrade.  I'm currently irritated that Google has gone out of their way to make it difficult to sync android phones with Outlook, so I will also look hard at Windows Mobile phones next time around.  What I will not look at, however, is an iPhone.  For me, Apple's phones are inferior to those of their competitors, and while I know they meet the needs of a lot of people, they fall short of my what I'm looking for.

The Incredible Hulk

I'm watching the pilot episode of The Incredible Hulk television series and a few things have occurred to me. 

1.  I don't know why I never realized this before, but it is essentially a modern day retelling of the Dr Jekyl and Mr Hyde story.  Both have a troubled doctor who manages to turn himself into an uncontrollable beast, and the two are seemingly separate people with no memory of what happens when he changes. It all seems so obvious now, I can't believe it just came to me now.  It also borrows from the biblical story of Samson, who was also known to wreak havoc when he got angry. 

2.  I wonder what the wardrobe budget is for Dr David Banner.  Every time he gets angry he destroys a shirt and pair of pants.  It's a good thing he's pulling down a doctor's salary otherwise he would quickly go bankrupt.  The Hulk was walking around barefoot, so I assume he destroyed his shoes too, but since they didn't explicitly show him busting out of them, it's possible he simply removed them.  That would save him a bit if he did.

3.  It is kind of a warning about the dangers of roid rage. 

4.  I find it somehow odd that even his nipples turn green when he changes.  I don't know why I should expect any different since his hair changes color as well, I guess I just thought that they would be a different shade of green.

 



5.  Finally, as he was lifting his car in a rage, I couldn't help thinking that someone needs to remind him to lift with his legs and not his back. If he gets a lower back injury, he will really get angry.  But then again, with his superhuman strength, maybe he's impervious to back injury.  Even a gun shot barely slowed him down, so I suppose that's a safe assumption to make. 

That's all I've got.  It's just a shame that Lou Ferrigno got typecast and never really had much of an acting career outside this show.  I guess his buddy Arnold Schwarzenegger took all the good roles for bodybuilders.  Maybe Lou should follow in Arnold's footsteps and run for governor.  It will have to be a smaller state though since he wasn't as popular as Arnold.  Maybe Wyoming.  And he would add to the growing list of former co-stars of Arnold to run for governor.  Although I guess he was never a co-star, just a friend.  Still, why not run anyway?

Open Letter To Netflix

I have a few comments and suggestions for Netflix, and since it is next to impossible to jump through all the hoops to contact Netflix through their website, and it will no doubt fall into a black hole and never get read even if I do get through all the nonsense, I'll just complain here. Although chances are nobody will read it here either, but at least it will make me feel better.

Let me start by talking about streaming television series.  I stream a lot of content through my Xbox, and the Xbox app sucks.  It is very irritating that you can't select which episode you want to watch, it automatically starts streaming when you select a series.  I won't say that somebody deserves to lose their job over that, but I will say that whoever is responsible for that decision deserves a running kick in the crotch.  Next, it would be delightful if, when watching a tv series, when you finish an episode, the following episode should automatically begin.  Or, better yet, you could simply program in how many episodes you would like to watch. And it should be this way on all platforms.

The user review feature has devolved to the point where it is pretty much useless.  It's time to drop it and only list professional reviews for movies.  The user reviews have not yet reached Youtube levels of hostility, stupidity, racism, etc, but they are quickly moving in that directions.  More and more they are becoming of the type, "Why isn't this streaming?  I pay $8 a month and feel entitled to access to every movie and tv show ever recorded" or, "this movie sux!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" or, "my DVD was scratched and I can't watch it."  Brainless comments such as these do nothing to help me decide if a movie is worth watching.  For a while, I would report dozens and dozens as 'not reviews' but apparently I'm fighting a losing battle because things are getting worse instead of better.  It's time to just dump the reviews all together. 

Finally, I would like to see an annual Netflix Film Festival every year around the time that there are other film festivals going on around the nation.  If you were able to get together some new, independent films for, say a month, that would be awesome.  And I have to think that a lot of indy film makers would be thrilled at the opportunity to have their films viewed by an audience as large as that of Netflix's subscribers.  I think this would be a win for everyone, I don't see a down side.

That's all I've got for now, however I reserve the right to update this at a future date.

Meteor Shower

With NASA and meteorologists worldwide promising celestial fireworks this evening, I grabbed a folding chair and parked myself in front of my building to take in all the glory of the annual Perseid meteor shower.  As it turns out, I ended up disappointed.  With the forecast for up to 100 meteors an hour, I sat out for an hour and 15 minutes, from 11:30 to 12:45, and saw a grand total of 5 meteors.  All of them relatively unimpressive - no bright ones streaking across the night sky.  The ones I witnessed briefly appeared and quickly faded away.  I also witnessed three constellations which I was able to identify - Ursa Major, Ursa Minor, and Cassiopeia - one satellite, two noisy and annoying teenage girls, one fat chick, one old bald guy, three raccoons, and a bird that I was unable to identify in the dark. In all fairness, I was not in an optimal viewing location though.  I had some trees obstructing my view, and was close to artificial lights.  Ideally I would have liked to have viewed them from my vacation home in the wilderness, out away from the city lights, but sadly I don't own a vacation home.  I guess I'll have to wait for the Leonid meteor showers in November.

My camera phone takes pretty lousy pictures in the dark, but if you look closely, you can make out some raccoon eyes peeking out from behind the tree. 

 

It wasn't all bad though.  For starters, I got to spend some quality time in the cool night air after a hot day.  And from time to time, it's very pleasant to  just sit and enjoy the peace and relative quiet of the evening.  It affords the opportunity to relax and think.  And as I gazed up at the stars and pondered the vastness of the universe, I found it odd that some people like Carl Sagan can look up at the sky and conclude that we are insignificant when you consider that we are on a medium sized planet, orbiting a smaller star, inside an average galaxy.  I, on the other hand, marvel at the fact that tucked away in our little corner of this massive universe is the only known life.  Certainly extraterrestrial life may exist, however it's also quite possible that we are alone in this universe and completely unique.  That makes me feel special, and makes me feel that life is precious.  And if life does exist on other planets, the odds that aliens are bipedal, with two arms, two eyes, generally just similar in size and appearance to humans is extremely unlikely, despite what those who claim to have been abducted would have you believe.  And if you believe in evolution, the odds that intelligent life would evolve into similar species on different planets is extremely unlikely.  It's more reasonable to think that purported alien sightings are time travelers from the future returning to our time.  And this is precisely the point where I decided that I'm done pontificating for the evening and it's time to get some sleep.

Burgers

Yesterday I got my lunch at Zippy's Giant Burgers.  I had been looking online for good burger joints in the area, and Zippy's kept showing up, so I decided I had to give them a try.  Conveniently located in White Center (convenient if you live in West Seattle or Burien, convenient for me yesterday because I was going to Alki anyway), they use fresh ingredients and grind the chuck on site, they don't buy pre-made frozen patties. 

I was pretty hungry when I got there and went all out and got myself the Last Gasp burger.  The last gasp contains pretty much everything you could want on a burger.  Starting with a quarter pound patty and the pre-requisite special sauce and veggies (lettuce, tomato, and pickle), they proceed to top it with a hot link, fried egg, bacon, and American cheese.  On a tangent, is American cheese the worst thing that this great nation has bestowed it's name upon?  I think so.  It's terrible, and I would be happy if it went out of production.  When I was in Denmark several years ago, they referred to it as 'plastic toast'.  Anyway, back to the burger - obviously it would have been better with some cheddar, pepper jack, havarti, smokey gouda, pretty much anything other than American - but was still a decent burger.  I found the hot link a little overpowering though.  It drowned out some of the other flavors a bit.  I also feel that the quality of bun could have been improved.  They use pretty much a standard sesame seed bun like you'd get at McDonalds or in an 8 pack at your local Supermarket.  I think that the bun is one of the most overlooked parts of a gourmet burger, and that if they switched to a toasted brioche bun or kaiser roll, that would significantly improve the flavor of the burger and ultimately the cachet of the restaurant. Ultimately, though, it was a pretty tasty burger.

In addition to the burger, I got some onion rings.  I'm please to say that they make battered onion rings rather than breaded rings.  If you're not a connoisseur of onion rings, believe me when I tell you that it makes all the difference in the world.  Battered rings are much crispier and have a richer flavor, and are just better in every way.  Zippy's gets the thumbs up from me for their onion rings, however they are still not as good as the best onion rings I've ever had which were at Crazy Eric's.  If you ever find yourself in Bremerton or the Puyallup Fair and in need of some cheap, greasy, delicious food, then Crazy Eric's is the place for you. But that's a review for another day.

I'm headed back to Alki next Monday and am planning on swinging by to try another burger that I am pretty curious about on the menu:  the Maui Wowie.  With spam, pineapple, teriyaki mayo, and swiss cheese, it could either be delicious or terrible.  I'm hoping for delicious, but either way it is at least pretty unique. So let me close by saying that Zippy's does have some good tasting food.  They are very reasonably priced in comparison with some other gourmet burgers in the area, but the burgers aren't as giant as you would expect based on the name.  Except for the King Lou Lou which has 4 quarter pound patties, 4 slices of cheese, 8 strips of bacon, and sauteed onions. That one sounds pretty giant.  I'd have to be pretty hungry to attempt to tackle that bad boy. Oh, and one last thing, they don't have any drinks on tap.  Only bottles of root beer and various other sodas, beer, and milk shakes. I didn't try a milk shake so I don't know how they taste, but I did find it odd that they didn't have any fountain drinks. 

Starbucks Refreshers

Starbucks recently provided me with a free Refresher beverage, so I feel I owe them a review.  The Refresher beverages are iced drinks made from green coffee extract and flavored with fruits.  I tried the very berry hibiscus flavor and am happy to report that it was quite tasty.  I've never tried green coffee extract before, so I didn't really know what to expect, but to me it tasted a lot like green tea flavored with fruit juice.  There was no coffee taste at all which, for a coffee lover like me, is a little disappointing, but may please the non-coffee crowd.  And if I find myself in the mood for something a bit different, it fits the bill.  It is refreshing, as advertised.  It does contain caffeine, however I don't know how much in comparison to and espresso drink or tea.  I would say it's comparable to a lemonade iced tea, or Arnold Palmer if you will, so if you like those, you'll probably like the refresher.  And since it hasn't been named after anyone yet, I believe I'll start calling it a Carson Palmer. 

And while I'm on the topic of Starbucks, I'd like to propose a question: why do I get served drinks with the hole in the lid lined up with the seam in the cup?  If I don't notice this before I start drinking, it's likely to result in coffee dripping on my shirt.  So I'm wondering, do baristas not pay any attention to the lid orientation and put it on randomly, or is this a way for baristas who think I'm a jerk to get a little payback?  I would think the former since I'm pretty affable, however with all of the attention to detail that Starbucks is known for, it makes me wonder if it's the latter. 

The Dark Knight Rises

I braved the torrential downpour today to catch the opening day showing of The Dark Knight Rises.  I got there nice and early to ensure I didn't have to sit in the front or on an aisle, and despite the fact that I only got there about 25 minutes prior to showtime - later than initially planned - there were only 2 people in the theater when I arrived.  To my surprise, the theater was less than half full when the show started.  Starting with the trailers, Argo looked interesting. Oz looks kind of bad, it has a strong Tim Burton vibe (not a good thing) but I didn't see his name in the credits.  I'm growing weary of superhero reboots, so I don't have much interest in Man of Steel. I also have a hard time getting interested in the Total Recall remake, particularly since the best part of the original - Arnold Schwartzenegger - is missing.  Also, there's something about Colin Ferrell that makes me want to punch him in the face.  On the other hand, if someone brainwashed me and convinced me that Kate Beckinsale was my wife, I'd be pretty happy about that.  Moving on, The Bourne Legacy seems to me like another cash grab sequel that will be mediocre at best. Finally, Jack Reacher is another Tom Cruise action movie that didn't seem to have much plot, at least not in the preview.  That's all of the previews I can remember, and overall there isn't much to get excited about. 

On to the feature: The Dark Knight Rises started out with an action scene which almost had me rolling my eyes.  I was a little concerned that there would be copious amounts of unrealistic action, but other than Hines Ward returning a kickoff for a touchdown in a later scene, it wasn't too bad the rest of the way. I mean, seriously, I don't think I've ever seen Ward return a kick.  But at least they used a professional football player rather than an actor. 

As you may already know, Bane is the villain in this flick, and since a hero is only as good as the villain, I was pleased to see that Christopher Nolan went to great lengths to turn him into a truly frightening sociopath.  No longer is he the hulking meat head he was in Batman & Robin (starring George Clooney), he is now intelligent and purposeful. I don't know if it was intentional, but his mask and raspy, labored voice made him somewhat reminiscent of Darth Vader.  Feel free to refer to him as Darth Bane if you like.  What I found really interesting about Bane and his followers, is that all their speeches and grandstanding sounded exactly like the Occupy Wall Street movement.  'The rich fat cats have been oppressing us for too long', and 'we're going to take back what's rightfully ours' and so on.  They continually fan the flames of class warfare to return Gotham city to the violent state it was in prior to Batman cleaning it up in the first film.  I'm not familiar with the comics, so I'm not sure if it's faithful to the source material, or if the film makers are trying to make a political statement, or if they are simply trying to be timely, but it was as if they watched news footage of the Occupy movement and added it to the script word for word.  Make no mistake, though, Bane was a worthy villain: powerful, ruthless, hateful, and if that weren't enough - kicked out of the League of Shadows for being too sociopathic. 

Catwoman is an interesting character as well. She retains the skin tight costumes from previous iterations (which Anne Hathaway looks great in by the way), but we no longer have to put up with any purring or ridiculous one liners.  She's a real character, rather than a caricature, and she keeps you guessing until the end whether she will turn into a hero or a villain.  Michael Caine, however really stole the show as Alfred.  He has a relatively small part in this film, but his scenes are highly emotionally charged and he truly left me in awe.  Some of the other emotional scenes border on sappy, but Michael Caine really nails it.  Joseph Gordon-Levitt also shines as John Blake, a young cop who is unusually perceptive and aids both Commissioner Gordon and Batman.  I think we'll see a lot more from him in the future. 

I can't say enough about how impressed I am with Christopher Nolan as a film maker.  Like the previous two installments, he takes source material that is steeped in fantasy and finds a way to make it realistic.  None of the characters have super powers or behave in unbelievable ways.  That, to me is what makes villains truly terrifying.  Vampires and zombies don't frighten me at all, but a brilliant serial killer like Hannibal Lechter or a violent and charismatic man like Bane who is able to recruit followers to his cause of creating anarchy is plausible enough to make me wary.  More importantly, Nolan is a brilliant story teller who is able to weave a tale in such a way that it's difficult to see what is coming without having to resort to crazy plot twists at the end like M Night Shayamalan.  The Dark Knight Rises keeps you engaged from beginning to end and at no time does the 2 hours and 45 minutes seem long or drag in any way.  I went into the movie with high expectations and it didn't let me down in any way.  In my opinion, this surpasses the Dark Knight, but I think I still prefer Batman Begins.  This film left me wanting more, unfortunately the only additional material I will ever see is bonus material on the DVD, which I now can't wait to purchase.